Mark Haskell Smith’s third novel takes place in the sex playground stereotype world of Thailand. Turk Henry, the story’s protagonist, is an ex-heavy metal rocker, the bass guitarist for the fictional Metal Assassin (not these guys), is a recovering sex addict (the irony of this is highly noted in the text) on vacation with his supermodel wife, Sheila. While Turk is content to sit on the beach day long throwing back Thai beers, his wife seeks out more adventurous activities, such as an elephant ride through the jungle that results in her kidnap by pirates (the modern day, un- Jolly Roger sort). The story then follows Turk as he attempts to pay the ransom to win back his wife, as a motley crew (another joke made numerous times in the novel) of supporting characters weave in and out of the narrative.

The greedy Immigration and Customs Enforcement agent, Turk’s manager and his over-sexed assistant, the equally over-sexed Australian bounty hunter, the under-sexed pirate captain and the underage Thai prostetute with a heart of gold all get subsections devoted to their inner monologues, a homeless man’s Dubliners. But instead of creating an interweaving network of perspectives, this approach creates a disjointed story where none of the characters become meaningfully developed.

From its premise on, Salty sure acts like a racy novel, almost like Chuck Palahniuk for the faint at heart. Unfortunately, the gross-out scenes aren’t squirm-educing enough, the sex scenes not juicy enough, the comedy bits not funny enough and the music bits certainly not relevant enough. Try as it might, every turn of this novel leaves something to be desired. But this is not to say that the novel is completely devoid of rewards. Salty isn’t meant to be a life-changing attempt at modernist literature; it isn’t one that will stand up to multiple readings or interpretations. Instead it is heart-on-its-sleeve brain candy, light summer reading for a light summer day. In that sense, comparisons to other novels probably aren’t fair: what Salty reminds the reader most of is the b-grade horror flick Touristas.